Sunday, February 15, 2009

Growing Up Blessed

I was so fortunate to grow up in a family who just adored me. All of my needs were met and I never had to want for anything. I felt loved each and every day and grew up in a neighborhood with plenty of kids and often played hide and go seek, baseball, kickball you name it. If I wasn't at my friends house they were at mine. I finally got ansy and married when I was very young for the first time, it was then at age nineteen I started to truly wonder if my birth family was living close by or just where exactly they maybe living.
I started to ask my adopted mom and dad questions to see if they may know any info that would help me to understand where I came from, unfortunately they knew no more than the paper I had been holding onto for so many years.
Three years passed and when I turned twenty two my desire to know info about my birth family became so strong. I imagined where they might be living, had our paths already crossed, were they themselves wondering where I may be? I had asked Frances, but it seemed to painful for her to talk about, almost as though she felt as though she may be forgotten once my birth family was found. I decided to ask my Edward as my parents had now been divorced for a few years even though they had remained good friends. Edward had told me he would research the info and see what he could find. I was so nervous yet excited to think I may finally have the answers I had longed for. The moment of hope was short lived as my adopted dad Edward became very sick with what we thought was pneumonia and turned out to be lung cancer. I remember that day so well my whole world seemed to shatter and it seemed as though my legs were like jelly. He was diagnosed in October of 92 and passed away December of the same year. It all happened so fast and not only did I lose my daddy it felt like my dream of ever finding my birth family died too that same day.
My husband and I divorced a few months later and I moved back in with Frances in order to get back on my feet. I was trying to keep busy and get back to work enjoying life as best I could. A year passed and I met my current husband right out of the blue. He was working at a local market a short distance from where I was staying and we hit it off. We started talking and evetually exchanged phone numbers and before we knew it we were dating and falling in love. We married in 94 and had a new home that my father in law had helped build and it wasn't long we were talking about starting a family.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Finding Out You Are Adopted

I was eight years old as I stated in my last post when I learned the truth about being adopted. I had such a loving family that at first I was a little confused, but loved Edward and Frances so much that I considered them my parents and still do. The paper I found gave very sketchy details... my birth name which I choose to keep private at this time, the time and date I was born, where I was born, how many hours of labor, the ages of my birth parents, and that their health was excellent at the time of my birth. I remember back then that that little piece of paper was enough for me at the time to hold onto and I didn't need to know anymore at the time. I felt deep in my heart that there must have been a good reason for my birth parents to put me up for adoption and I was so loved that I just hung onto that paper never realizing that I would want to pursue things further when I got older. I wrote Frances a note that day telling her how much I loved her and that I believed she was my mom and nothing would ever change that and I realized I was adopted and I didn't want her to worry because nothing had changed. I still have that note today as a friendly reminder of the day I first realized I was adopted.

Adopted at 3 weeks old

I had no idea when I was born that two miracles had taken place, it wasn't til years later I found out what a true blessing I was. First I was given the gift of life and then I blessed beyond measure the family who chose to accept me unconditonally and call me there very own.
I was born in a local community hospital to a mom and dad whom at the time had made a mistake and realized after getting married that it wasn't going to work. My mom was 17 and my dad 23 and they were together for only a very short time. They had since dissolved their relationship and went separate ways even though they were still married at the time of my birth. My dad had no idea I was even a girl and when the birth took place reluctantly signed the adoption papers with a heavy heart having no idea that our paths would ever meet again.
My adopted family took me home and was thrilled to be parents which was something they had often thought about, but never realized would happen as they had tried unsuccessfully and then realized my adopted dad(whom I'll call Edward) could not have children. Edward and my adopted mom(whom I'll call Frances) were such loving parents and they absolutely adored me, my whole family did. I was what you would call spoiled and I had such an awesome childhood. I never even new that I was adopted til I was 8 years old and a friend told me what I already suspected where I had found some papers with sketchy details jotted down by Edward and in a hat box in Frances's closet.